Therapy for Eating Disorders
You Just Wanted to Look Your Best
"You look amazing! How did you do it?"
They're just being nice.
You do look amazing. Well, better.
Not as good as you'd like.
But it feels good to hear your effort acknowledged.
But they have no idea the war they just set off in your mind.
Because you did it by obsessing over Calories.
By squeezing every moment to exercise: stairs, planks, knee bends, anything to burn a few more calories.
The less in, the better.
Food, when you couldn't avoid it, stopped being enjoyable.
High-calorie foods became so scary it's almost like being in the same room with them would make you gain six pounds.
When Your Control Becomes Out-of-Control
Because at any moment you could break down.
You've done it before.
It becomes a no-holds-barred throwdown past the point of feeling sick.
After that you can't think of anything but getting rid of it, until you do.
You smile and thank your friends.
Because you can't tell them you did it by turning into that girl with the secret eating disorder.
The War You Can't Talk About
It's not just the food.
To eat or not to eat, what to eat or not eat, the fixation on Calories, ignoring hunger, pushing through soreness or injury to move a little bit more.
That would be struggle enough.
It's the secrets.
The guilt.
The fear of being discovered.
The friendships, the family members, you've pushed away.
The constant monitoring.
The relentless dissatisfaction with your body and yourself.
The dread of seeing yourself and hating it.
And yet you cannot look away.
A Therapist Who Knows Eating Disorders Can Understand You
Therapy with a therapist who understands eating disorders just looks and feels different.
Someone who isn't surprised or weirded out or grossed out.
Disordered eating carries health risks, too.
And frankly, not everyone is willing to bring that into their practice.
But the right therapist is more than someone who understands your disordered eating patterns.
It's about helping you understand you.
How you got here.
And how you can find your way back.
Your Disordered Eating: You and Your Frenemy
There's something I know that most people don't understand.
Or won't admit it.
There are good reasons for your disordered eating.
That doesn't make them healthy reasons.
But your behaviors (restricting, over-exercising, bingeing, purging, or some combination) helped you solve your problems.
Emotional problems.
Even spiritual problems.
They could have helped you keep the source of your greatest satisfaction, like your role on the competition dance team.
Those reasons are part of you.
And that part of you deserves compassion and understanding.
So yes, together we'll target the destructive behaviors (food avoidance, mirror-checking, the secrets and lies, even misuse of pharmaceuticals) using proven techniques like ERP (Exposure with Response Prevention).
You'll learn to relax like you've never known before.
Then use that relaxation to conquer your fears.
With guidance and support, you'll bring some of your secrets into the light.
You'll set up support from others: friends and family, and nutritionists and medical specialists if needed.
And with cognitive and emotional techniques, the most important being Compassion-Focused Therapy, together we'll connect how the thoughts and feelings you're having now are tied to needs from your past.
Then we'll find how you can meet those needs in ways that don't sacrifice the health of your mind, body, and soul.
What a Girl Dad Sees in You
I'm a girl dad.
It's not that she's just precious to me, it's that she IS precious.
I've just been here to witness it.
It would break my heart if she ever got to the point where she couldn't see it.
I don't want that for her.
And I don't want that for you either.
The Third You: The Real You
People talk a lot about the struggle between yourself, the parts of your mind and life you choose, and the eating disorder.
From what I know of how our feelings-powered mind works, that's not a bad way to put it.
But that's the two sides of the war.
The truth is there's a third you: the part that moves beyond the disorder and beyond your fight against it.
It's the real you: your passions, your beliefs, your dreams, your place in it all, all the things that make you a precious person, unlike any other.
Finding that person is what therapy is about.
And one day, someone will say, "You look amazing. How did you do it?"
You'll smile and thank them.
And no war will start behind your eyes.
The honest answer won't be Calories, or secrets, or a throwdown you're dreading.
It'll be you: the real you, the one who finally found her way back.
Don't wait.
Send me an email to get started: corypearcephd@gmail.com.
We'll set up a free consultation and talk through whether working together feels right for you.
Take It Back
These problems get worse when you wait. Yours doesn't have to.
Start getting your life back today. A message through the website is always the fastest way to reach me.
Send Me a Message